No more Mahjullah Singapura, Here comes Advance Australia Fair

I have been thinking about this matter for quite some time. My Dad and younger sister have decided to give up their Singapore citizenship for an Australian one. Dad would have to sell the family property in Singapore and would be able to take out his CPF which is a reasonably large sum. The next course of action is to purchase a property here. At the moment, not too much pressure has been exerted for me to follow suit but Mum did suggest that I consider that alternative as University fees would be cheaper (I’ll get 20% discount if I pay upfront or I could opt for H.E.C.S which means I don’t pay for my Uni fees until I get an income over a certain amount.)  As she said, I don’t have anything tying me to Singapore. The pay in Australia is much higher than it would be in Singapore, and even if I was posted back to Singapore to work, it’d be as an expat which means I’d be earning more than a local anyways.

Mum’s right, I don’t have any assets tying me to Singapore but I do have sentiments and memories. I grew up in Singapore. Played in the bacteria infested sandy playground. Cried when I was late for Primary school Had the occasional mishaps here and there. Met wonderful people. Met not-so-wonderful people. Went through the hell that is the Singaporean Education System. My first crush was in Singapore. My first breath of air was in Singapore. Just thinking back to my childhood embarrassingly brings tears to my eyes. A flood of snippets from that time period just hit me like a brick wall. I can’t remember too much of the details because I’ve got other things on my mind at the moment but they are all fragments of my past. I am who I am, partially, because of that.

I found some of my baby pictures. They’re quite embarrassing but it’s funny and nostalgic at the same time.

We caught the scent of McDonalds! I’m the one in the middle by the way… Trained assassins since we were old enough to walk :p My giraffe outfit. I had the most mischievous grin ever! My little sister and me! She was still cute back then.

I came to Sydney before I collected my IC. That was ages ago. Since then I’ve made new friends, almost gotten used to the life here, still swear every now and then that the shops close way too early, I have become accustomed to Australia. It was only after I had completed Year 12 of high school that I had to return to Singapore for conscription. I remembered back then I was terrified. I had never been away from my family before. The loneliness was something I was unfamiliar with and not willing to try. My worst fear was about my sexuality. This may sound silly but there are no doors in the army showers. I feared the homophobia that might develop if I was “blacklisted” as “one of them”. (Thankfully I got posted to SCDF! Hurray for showers with doors!) To this day, no one has seen me completely nude since puberty. Not even the doctors during the medical checkups for enlistment. I have been spared the humiliation of having to “cough”

I wouldn’t mind being the doctor in this situation.

Life in C.D. has been quite an eye opener. No offence to the army guys, C.D. doesn’t train us to kill imaginary enemies, they train us to save real lives. Our basic training involved the same regimentation, the same shitty barber that shaves off your hair against your wishes and you still have to end up paying for it yourself, same hours spent leaning over boots with Kiwi, furiously polishing away for the next days’ foot drill, same stupid route marches, same hours of sweat in the sun (except mine was pretty much either in camp or in the furnace or the Mandai training village). I never got to shoot a rifle during NS though but I’ve got to see amputated limbs, twisted piles of flesh stuck between the wheels of the train and the railway tracks, road traffic accident cases, suicide cases with both good and bad endings.  I’ve made very close friends during the biggest waste of 2 years of my life. It was only when I was posted out together to the Public Affairs Branch to the the pioneer batch of Public Education Instructors with 4 other guys that I realised, I wasn’t alone. Out of the 5 of us, 3 of us were here on our own. One was from Hong Kong/UK and the other was from Japan/KL/Germany and there was me. The other 2 had their families in Singapore with them but we still went through the shit together without too much unpleasantness. We progressed from nearly-bald recruits through the ranks to private, lance corporal and finally corporal. I was meant to get to Sergeant but due to some medical conditions and the changes in directive, unable to despite my head of department’s expression of displeasure to HQ. Oh well, I didn’t really mind all that much. It was almost over anyways. I would have had to go for another course to become Sergeant anyways. =) During that time I got up to a lot of shenanigans. I had my first alcoholic drink in Singapore (I do not like beer!)

With a ciggie in hand (it’s not mine! Honest!) I couldn’t stop laughing when he tried to get me to take a picture.

Apart from drinking, I went to my first gay club in Singapore, did a strip dance, pole dance and a lot of sliding down poles (thanks to C.D. for that). It was a lot of fun. Treasured memories.

Oh time for dinner now, I hope this little trip down memory lane has been as entertaining for you as it has been nostalgic for me.

Lurbs yew long time,

Jo(n)